Friday, January 11, 2008

I wear skorts...

For those of you who don't know, I play squash in the Montreal interclub squash league for McGill. I am not very good, but they needed another woman to fill a position in their D-league. I figured that there would be very few expectations for me to win so I decided to join. I haven't done too poorly this year; my record is currently 3-1.

I had a game this Wednesday and it was a bit different. The scene is this: Monteal's nicest raquet club. It was gorgeous - I have never been a club like this. The change rooms were insane; there were little vanities so that you could reapply your makeup and do your hair, nice plush chairs in which to relax, mouth wash, hairspray and other amenities available. This is not your average university gym. There are a couple of bars and lounges and it was in the cutest building ever. The only problem I had with it was it's dress code: all players must wear all white.

Seriously. In order to play one evening of squash, I had to go out and buy an all white outfit. What regular-sweating person wears white gym clothes. So my quest for finding white gym clothes began. Do you know how hard it is to find white shorts in January? Impossible. I searched 6 stores until I found a white skort. Ya, that is right. I had to wear a skort. A white, somewhat frilly skort. It was quite cute, but I am not really the type of person who plays sports in a dress. It feels too girly for me. Because I am cheap, I leave the tags on the skort. Don't judge me! I am a poor grad student and can't justify spending 30$ on a skort I will wear once, even if I wore it and sweat in it for an hour. Ya, I am disgusting, whatever.

So I needed to find a white top to go with my frilly white skort. Thankfully, my friend Stephanie had a white shirt for me. Now, I totally am very thankful for her lending me the shirt, however, I don't think this was a shirt my mother would call white. It was more of an off-white (and there may have been a small purple berry stain on it). It was not the same colour white as my skort. So my white skort, my off-white shirt...what else can I wear? I know! A black sports bra and navy socks. I looked like the most out of place player there.

So I feel like an impostor in my outfit, but it's all about the attitude. I pretend like I belong there. I think I failed. I figure I am going to get my ass kicked. Who pays crazy membership fees to play squash if they aren't going to be super awesome? My opponent arrives and she is really nice but she is totally a hot mom. Maybe late 30s and completely decked out in the cutest white lulu lemon outfit ever. I don't think my body has or will ever look as good as her's...I think I hate her totally respect her dedication to maintaining her MILF-like body.

The first game she beats me 9-2. I hate losing and I feel that this game is going to be over quickly. But wait...I come back to win the next two games 9-1 and 9-4. Go me! I only have to win one more game and victory is all mine. But it has only been two weeks since Christmas and my Christmas goodies and liquor are still clogging my system - I am not in peak physical condition. I lose the fourth game 9-0. I couldn't move anymore. Now we are tied 2-2 and I am not a good loser. I am determined to win this game and send mommy packing. The game starts - she is up 2-0 before I get the serve back. I tie the game up 2-2 but in the tying point I jump to hit a ball and twist my ankle. Smooth. So now I am a sweaty, out of shape, skort and off-white shirt wearing gimp. Awesome. I walk it off (cause I am tough) and go on to win the game. Victory is mine!

So another win for me! Three more games to go this season. Hopefully the store Winners will take my sweating skort back...

"Hike up your skort a little more, and show your world to me" - DMB

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You are totally my hero! :)
Awesome. You are a great write Rachel ! And evidently, a great squash player. Good luck with returning the skort :)
i think you should keep the skort and wear it when you play squash here with the boys :P
I may have a better chance of beating them if I distract them with my feminine wiles...
exactly what i was thinking oh wiley one
Yeah, you should totally keep the skort, if only just because it's fun to say skort.
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